How to live with less but feel MORE.
In a world of endless accumulation, could having less actually help us feel more? The surprising freedom and joy that comes with simplicity is a hard to grasp concept. It has taken me exactly 28years and six months to still not grasp the idea of not wanting things. Don't get me wrong, I want to not want things...but I find myself easily distracted by not having. If that's you, let's dive into this piece; and if you've conquered the little monster of materialism and comparison, even on an emotional and spiritual level, then well done...you can go and play outside.
The struggle.
Good, now that we got rid of the people pretending not to look across the fence every now and then, let's engage a bit about why we struggle to live with less. There is a plethora (thanks Three Amigos) of articles out there explaining why materialism or our desire for more...even on other than material levels. So I am going to leave you to it to go and read up on that (Start here: The Endless Pursuit.) The short answer is: we've been built like that. The line, however between wholesomely pursuing more and just randomly wanting shit other people have has become so blurry in todays culture, that we struggle to keep track of it all.
The most important part of our journey, admitting that it's a struggle, has luckily already begun if you are here...so let's try and see how we can give this thing the middle finger.
Baby Steps
Living with less but feeling more starts with a single step...it might be a mind shift, a little gesture like giving away your favorite salt shaker or it can be a 'catching fish with dynamite' approach like sleeping on the floor and burning all your furniture. I have a good mate who did that once, although I don't recommend the latter...let's start small. The start of living with less is to recognize that we don't need the things we think we need. Attaching ourselves to unnecessary possessions or even admirations, might be the weightiest things holding us down.
If you know me, you know I like a dream board, a plan and a strategy, so I am not saying to not pursue the girl of your dreams or start a business...but what I am saying is that if you make the next pursuit the only thing you ever pursue, it's going to clog your life with stuff you don't need and leave you empty at the end of the day. If you are stull following along, good, because I lost myself a bit for a while, but in essence where I am getting at, is that the 'fight' for 'less' in our lives, starts with purposefully placing something in our life or removing something that will make us uncomfortable...because from discomfort, comes the greatest discoveries.
Eating the elephant.
How do you eat an elephant? In this case, the elephant is a metaphor...we aren't going to start exploring exotic cuisine in this blog just yet. The metaphor is for a lack of a better word, the 'American Dream': Having stuff just to have stuff, the wife, the car, the house, the golfclubs etc. Instead of this being a tutorial about how to gradually consume a 2000+kg animal, I am going to introduce you to another option on the menu: The Side Salad of Content. It's probably a phase I am going through, and that's why I am writing about this so much...but we need to enjoy what we have and where we are more. This side salad approach moves our focus away from the other offerings on the table and keeps us focused on the year and now. Does this mean we throw out dreaming of a bright yellow 2025 Ford Ranger Raptor with my custom initials embroidered on the seats? NO, of course not, but we are happy with the paid off 2018 Fiesta that drives like a dream, because that is where we are now and what we are fortunate to have. What do we get in return? Feeling more.
Feeling More.
The feeling more part is not a trip down psychology lane, nor is it a guided process on how to get in touch with your softer side (I have written other blogs on that). Feeling more refers to the weightlessness of not having expectation on your shoulders. A stuffed house can make you feel stuffed, constantly worrying about where you are compared to your friends makes you feel emotionally obese. If you live with less worries about what's going on around you, there is more space for fun stuff. It's essential to still look at your peers or at people that matter to you or that you look up to and aspire to things, but the sooner we realize that it's not a race, the better off we will be.
Let's make it practical again with 'stuff': If I only have a table and chair in the spare bedroom that doubles up as a studio, there is MORE space and therefore (at least in my mind) I feel less cluttered in all areas of my life. I have more time, because I have less things to clean and I have more space in my head to be creative.
I realise that I am preaching while I'm learning, but I genuinely get excited by clearing things out and really getting down to the essentials. For most of my life I pursued getting more things and better things, but then feeling like a hamster in a wheel. I got out the wheel now and although it might seem less glamourous in an emptier house, the things that are there, are valuable and worth keeping! TF
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